When hubby and I decided to try to become parents, we were curious who our child would look like and so did our friends and family. Baby #1, Angelo looked totally like hubby (as you know) and as much as I adore him, I felt a bit insecure. Baby #2, Valentina popped out two years later and as much as she looked like her big brother, it was evident that she would get darker and have different hair texture. Everyone who saw Valentina remarked how much she looked like a brother then commented on her complexion. Now as she’s maturing people say Valentina looks more like me every day. I could not see me in my daughter until today.
This morning hubby and Angelo were asleep and Valentina and I were having some one to one time. She looked at me and I saw hints of me and my family traits in her face. The shape of her face is like mine. Her nose is like mine. Her mouth is like mine (even though she bites her bottom lip like her daddy). Her hair is a bit like mine when I was little. (I wish I had close up baby pics of myself. The few pics that I do have I can’t find. One of the downsides of life as an expat. Sometimes things go missing in transit).
Me @ 3 or 4 years old
My lil sis roughly 3-6 months with our mum
Val @ 6 months
Valentina’s expressions are like mine. Today I saw me in my daughter and I was happy, happy in a way I didn’t expect I’d be. I feel a sense of belonging. We belong to each other. We ‘match’. I don’t love my son any less now that Valentina in my life. If anything, as time goes by we get closer and more attached to each other. Our love is fierce. It will be interesting to see how my daughter and I ‘gel’ as mother and daughter, as time goes by. For now I enjoy her caresses as she breastfeeds. I enjoy her the special smiles she has just for me. Best of all I relish our one to one cuddle time when she babbles, giggles and dribbles all over me.
Do you have a biracial or mixed race child? Does it matter to you how much she or he does or doesn’t look like you? I’d love to hear your feelings and experiences.
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