Recently, I’ve changed Valentina’s hair regime. True, she is only 7 months but I’ve decided to start conditioning her hair, after its been shampooed. Her hair seems to capture dust (from heavens knows where) and that causes tangles. Prior to this, I would put a natural oil in her hair a few minutes before the shampoo (known as ‘pre-poo’ in natural afro hair circles) and this would help prevent her hair from getting too dry. I still. A few months ago I could easily finger detangle and comb her curls, its now become necessary to use a comb everyday. I’ve a bit spoilt as I never had to fuss much with Angelo’s hair. Even now, I can get away with finger combing his cherub-like curls because I’m no longer allowing it to grow. Valentina has soft silky curls but they are smaller and tighter than Angelo’s which means more haircare is required. So, I still pre-poo her hair (and Angelo’s) occasionally. Angelo has noticed that I spend more time on Valentina’s hair and he’s now requesting that I comb his hair too.
|Valentina playing with my twisted hair after her feed
I think in Angelo’s little mind I’ve found something else that takes me away from him. I’m still breastfeeding Valentina and although I combination feed and I try give her more boob than formula. The result is that Valentina is in my arms to be breastfed and to have her hair combed. ‘Jealousy’ is too strong a word but I think that Angelo feels a bit left out, especially since sees the time and care I take in maintaining my own natural hair.
|Xmas 2011, 1 year old
|Angelo 11 months old
I try to make my children feel my love in all that I do for them. I believe its just as important to show love, in deeds as well as in words. Whether its grooming them, feeding them or a simple caress, my love is present.n Don’t it not a major issue, but Angelo is as sensitive as he is energetic and boisterous. So I’d like to strike a balance in what I do for both children. While I think of something that can be special just between he and I, I’ll give an extra helping of cuddles.
What are your thoughts? How would you deal with a situation like I’m experiencing at the moment? How do you strike a balance between your childrens’ different needs?