At the risks of sounding corny, over the Christmas holidays I got teary-eyed because I was so full of joy. Yeah I know, but it’s true. I said a little prayer and thanked God for my blessings, all three of them, my family. Life wasn’t always that joyous for me. So how did I get here? The moment I stopped trying to fit into someone else’s plans, I was free. When I would no longer accept, it’s complicated, I was free. 2018, lets think about our relationship goals, be clear about the types of relationships we want in our lives.
Only when we are whole and complete in ourselves can we attract the people we want in our lives. Now, I wouldn’t say I hated myself. I’ve always been an advocate of self-care and wellbeing; keep fit; mani pedi, facials, the works. I also enjoyed (and still do) enjoy my own company. However, the mistake I often made was trying or adapt to my partner. I was also very hard on myself; when made errors in judgement. Shall we say, I had an unhealthy relationship with food? My hair sometimes took the brunt too. Be kind to yourself, take it easy.
Love yourself enough to be true to yourself no matter what. Frankly it’s easier said than done. I hate arguments and confrontation. Now this is an area I still have to work on. You know, keeping quiet to keep the peace. Sometimes, I’d end up with a massive tension headache trying to keep quite. Or maybe you suppress want you really want to be more appealing? Is it worth it really? Be honest with yourself.
All relationships require some level of compromise but no compromise should be soul crushing. The only way to know what to compromise is by being strong and whole in you. If not, you’re likely to become a door mat for someone to step over into their light. Words of support or tough love from those you hold dear can give you clarity. Be clear on what you can and cannot give up.
Being self-assured is an attractive quality. When you are confident, you are unmissable and unforgettable. I’ve spent my lifetime working on my confidence. The amount of times I missed opportunities because I was too shy to step forward or put my hand up. Then there were times when I stepped forward in faith and with purpose, suddenly, there’d be an opening. Be brave.